An ode to an old grape
Ooobidibobidi, my fellow adventurers! It is with glad tidings that I write today to follow up (finally!) on a portion of our travels to the Outer Banks earlier this year. Perhaps you will recall that I made mention of the revered “Mother Vine” in Manteo, NC and the elusive “scuppernong”. No? Of course you don’t, for I did not write about it yet. Well, then, ‘pull up a hover board’ as the younglings say and I shall explain…
Many months ago, a conversation with a local in Manteo set us upon a quest. A quest for a very particular variety of muscadine grape dubbed “scuppernong”. We had been told that this variety of grape originates from a particular vine in the area called “The Mother Vine“, just a few minutes away from the downtown area and despite being on private property, is open to the public to be ooh-ed and aah-ed over. So, naturally, we went to pay the great Mother a visit.
Believed by some to be the oldest grapevine in North America dating back over 400 years, the “Mother” is quite expansive and impressive with thick and twisting roots that were just begging to be climbed. But I resisted. As it was winter, it was quite bare but in the summer time, we can well imagine its splendor covered in green grapes.
The owners of the property very kindly have a sign directing any visitors to the vine (which we did not see at first as we parked in the wrong driveway. Or rather, the GIRL parked in the wrong driveway. I told her to keep going but she paid me no heed.) There was also a short path through the woods that led to a beautiful view of the water. The girl enjoyed the peaceful water setting for a time while I succumbed to my desires and started climbing and exploring the tree canopies.
So, after seeing the source, we were contractually obligated to try a sample of this particular scuppernong grape. Ah, but herein came the true challenge and quest. Not the most common of grapes, it was rather difficult to locate, especially in the winter time when more stores were closed. We visited local shops and groceries in Manteo, made calls, researched on the holo net. No luck. That is, until…THAT day……
Yes. THAT day. In truth, I have only a vague recollection of the details as many months have now passed. But if my memory serves me, our noble quest for the illusive scuppernong jelly finally came to completion in the unassuming town of Blowing Rock, NC in a local grocery market. Whilst browsing the shelves, our eyes alighted upon a single jar of jelly proudly displaying the mighty scuppernong name! Our jaws dropped like a jawa and the girl could not help herself as she let out a wild shriek of delighted surprise.
Carefully cradling our prize, more precious than a mudhorn egg, we tucked it away for transport back to our abode. After such a long quest, it was awarded a place of high honor on the top pantry shelf in the kitchen. And there it stayed……
For days. Then weeks. Then months.
Why, you ask, did we not sample it immediately? Alas, only the shadow knows. No doubt there were good reasons at the time. But I assure you, the girl and I did eventually open it and give it a try! After such a period of suspense and build up could it possibly live up to the hype? Well….no.
Do not misunderstand, there was nothing wrong with the taste. But it did not make a very strong impression on either of us. As a grape tending towards the more bitter end of the spectrum, there was clearly an abundance of sugar that was added and the overarching flavor was simply “sweet”. Perhaps a little too sweet for Jessica but I, having more of a sweet tooth, did not mind it as much.
We were also slightly put off by the color. Like many of you humans, I eat with my eyes first. We considered the pale, translucent color of the jelly to be a bit unattractive and are of the opinion that our peanut butter and grape jelly sandwich simply looks more appealing with the traditional purple jelly than a near clear yellow.
To conclude, we are beyond pleased to have actually found and sampled this particular variety of grape jelly, especially after we had paid homage to its source in Manteo. However, it is not a product that we would need to buy again. Now, we are faced with a nearly full jar wondering what in the galaxy to do with it. Perhaps an investigation into our Galactic Cookbook is in order! A peanut butter and jelly milkshake? Fancy jelly filled Life Day cookies? Or perhaps we will simply make more peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and just close our eyes.
If you’ve read to the end, thank you! If you’ve not read to the end, please send me a cookie. (I prefer chocolate chip. Soft. Warm. Slightly gooey.)
As it is almost Halloween, we wish to leave you with a Halloween joke:
What is the scariest planet in the galaxy? (NaBOO)
I lied. I am giving you two.
What does Rey put on her doorstep at Halloween? (Jakku lanterns)
May The Crumb Be With You and Happy Halloween!
Written 10/25/26
